THURSDAY AUGUST 7, 2014
First reading from Jer. 31:31-34, Ps. 51, Mt. 16:13-23
I find today’s first reading challenging and consoling. There
are four lines that made me stop and reflect about how God sees me and wants of
me. These four lines appear as a pattern; “they broke my covenant,” “I will
place my law within them and write it in their hearts,” “All shall know me,” “I
will forgive and forget their evildoing, their sin.” This pattern covers the journey of faith, my relation with God. I consider my relationship
with God like that of a young man trying to hit on a girl who accepts but
keeps avoiding him at times if not often. However, the man patiently waits as
if he cannot get another girl!
I break the covenant I have with my Lord quite often and
hope to get the fulfillment He gives from somewhere else. I pray for a time
where what He wants of me will come naturally to me but I realize that can only
be in heaven. As long as I am in this body, I will break his covenant. But today
He says that He shall write His law in my heart by giving me conviction of why
I should live for him. This is my deepest desire. Above all, He does something
no human can do; forgive AND forget. This has happened on the cross already and
it continuously happens at the Altar when Jesus offers His self for me. I come
to know God, my covenant with Him is renewed and I receive Him into my heart.
God talks to me heart to heart! If only I can learn to be silent enough and
listen!
Jesus goes on to challenge His disciples and me too. “Who do
you say I am?” More than what I have been taught or I know in my head about
Christ, who He is in my daily living, in my interaction with others and my
activities is what matters most. It is easier to mention some nice words about
who Jesus is but it’s harder to live Him daily. Yet even what I know about Him
is a revelation of God to me and not because I deserve it but because He wants
me to know Him, to renew His covenant with me, to write His law into my heart
and to live for Him and in Him! And above all, He gives me the Church, headed
by Peter the Pope and confirms it for all times in such a way as to say that if
you hold onto this Church, you are on the right way, the truth and life
Jesus accepts His sufferings and His destiny and talks to
the disciples about it. The response of Peter to Jesus consoling Him and saying
that such an evil should not happen to Him is met with a rebuke! Humanly
speaking, we console people and we want the best for them and we ask God not to
let them or even ourselves suffer. What if God wants us to pass through that?
Peter’s well thought and sensitive statement has for its source, the Satan! How can that be? Could my compassion that I could have for people who are suffering or about to face a seemingly insurmountable challenge be from Satan? A misplaced compassion? Sometimes
I want to take control, complete control of my life whereas that is not
possible. I pray to God protect me from suffering and when He does not, I feel
that He does not care or will not respond and I get frustrated. Help me Lord to
walk with you, to accept daily sufferings patiently without seeking to run
away. Help me to renew my covenant with you, to listen to the your Law that you
have written in my heart, to know you and to believe that my sin is always
forgiven and forgotten the moment I turn back to you with true contrition and
desire to love and live for you. I can only say with with today's response to the Psalm, "Create a clean heart in me O God!"
